Sunday, June 25, 2006
10 reasons why I hate you

1. I hate you because your smile is just too infectious to me.

2. I hate you because your voice sounds so good it just turns me to jello.

3. I hate you because you're so good to me most of the time.

4. I hate you because I put so much trust in you.

5. I hate you because every fault you have only makes you all the more flawless.

6. I hate you because you made me see the world differently than before I met you.

7. I hate you because you because every time i think of you it just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

8. I hate you because I can't get enough of you every time we talk.

9. I hate you because thinking about you keeps me up at night.

10. Most of all I hate you because I love you so much it hurts sometimes, for I know that when we eventually part ways, I would feel an emptiness inside that would always remain. I hate you...
Jin Han 12:44 AM

Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Went to watch a play called Mobile yesterday night. You really do not want to know the details. It was pretty grisly. It struck a chord in me today that we as human beings have this instinct to want more than is provided, be it in the form of money, love or happiness. I was in Kinokuniya a few hours ago staring at a couple of books that I wanted really badly. I already had enough books to last me a while but simple desire made it difficult to refrain from the temptation. These two pieces of writing were not inexpensive; both hardcovers, both covered with beautiful symbols and printed with gold and silver patterns. At 300 bucks a book I didn't know whether to just dismiss the thought of buying it altogether or jumping at the opportunity to own these classic masterpieces. Believe me, having something which you have wanted for the longest time appear right in front of your eyes really does a number on you when making a choice whether to take it or leave it. Your head starts spinning searching for a solution, trying to differentiate the need from the want, hoping that in the end you would have made the right decision. Whichever option would eventually cause some form of lament in yourself: if you got it, you might regret sacrificing something for it; if you didn't, you might be kicking yourself for not taking the opportunity. Well, that was how I felt a couple of hours ago anyway. I didn't get those books.

I guess the same concept applies to just about everything in life, or at least anything that involves taking a chance. Business propositions, matters of the heart, product purchases... Yeah, just about everything. Was surfing a forum an hour ago and I chanced upon a topic about what people want for their birthdays. A few people mentioned that they would be perfectly happy if their crushes wished them a happy birthday. I think that is complete bull. If that were to happen, you would just want more after all was said and done. You get a wish this year, you would want a hug; you get a hug the next year, you would crave for a peck on the cheek and so forth. People are never truly satisfied with themselves. Pretty people will want to be prettier, intelligent people will want more knowledge, opulent families will want more money in their pockets... You get the picture. Don't you wish that you could just turn this off? I certainly do.
Jin Han 7:26 PM

Wednesday, June 14, 2006
I have found the relationship between Arwen and Aragorn(from the Lord of the Rings) to be exceptionally poignant. Aragorn fell in love with Arwen in 2951 (he was 20 years old; she was about 2700) but she did not share his feelings until they met again in Lórien many years later. It was pretty strange that Elrond, Arwen's father, disapproved of their love vehemently because Elrond himself is a product of the marriage between an elf and a human. Anyway, what made their relationship pretty emotional was that Arwen was willing to put everything on the line for her bethrothed even in the face of death. She gave up her immortal life in pursuit of a union with Aragorn, stood by him when hope seemed lost, and risked her life in the hope that they would survive the War of the Ring. Despite Elrond's wishes for her to sail to the Undying Lands where there was no grief or war, Arwen was still adamant on leaving her husband-to-be, even after Elrond told her that there was nothing for her on middle earth,only death as he saw in his prognostication. Her spirit could not be broken as Aragorn's could not. Aragorn on the other hand, devoted himself to becoming the King of Men, for it was only then that he could wed Arwen. The possibility of a love with Eowyn did not pry him from his fidelity to Arwen, only proving that his love was unbreakable. It was their love that motivated him to do great deeds, thus becoming a noble leader in the hearts of all. Of course, they eventually got what they wanted and had 3 children together. Their tale is one replete of hope and the strength of love. It may be a complete work of fiction but hey, it's something we all dream about sometimes isn't it?

Ae ú-esteliach nad, estelio han, estelio ammen

if you trust nothing else,trust this, trust us.

P.S. Arwen and Aragorn are distant relatives. Aragorn's ancestor, Elros, is Arwen's uncle and Arwen is Aragorn's cousin 63 times removed. Heh, doesn't that just put a damper on your opinion of them? Oh yeah, J.R.R. Tolkien just had to add in that little detail of incest to ruin a perfectly sweet tale between two lovers. Sheesh...

Jin Han 11:39 PM

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Jin loves brownies, cookies and cake.
Jin has never been anywhere further than Australia.
Jin could never stop being a sadistic, sarcastic meanie.
Jin is also the opposite of everything said one line up when the need arises.
Jin would rather have a desktop rather than a laptop.
Jin has an obsessive, compulsive need to ramble, blabber and regurgitate all manner of nonsense.
Jin hates being ignored by the people he loves.
Jin hates being alone most of the time.
Jin hates reflecting about his actions. It's taxing.
Jin has a habit of thinking too much.
Jin often doesn't see the glass as half-empty or half-full.He just sees the glass.
To some, Jin is weird; to others, Jin is even weirder.
Jin wants nothing more than to be happy. Rich would be a big plus though.
Jin is pretty tired of referring himself in the third person's perspective.

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Being apart from my sayang.
Seeing animals get tortured.
Seeing people get hurt.
Losing what's important to me.
Sluggish internet connections.
Bittergourds and zombies.

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