Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Time flies so quickly nowadays. It seemed like just yesterday my sister just returned from Australia, but in fact she is already departing Malaysia for Melbourne on Sunday. She doesn't want to leave because it would mark another beginning towards living independently - cooking, cleaning and the like by oneself. For me? Well I just can't wait to go to Australia, no idea why. I guess I just haven't tasted life without my parents watching over me and doing my own things, to make my own choices and do what I want with my life. It scares me that I'm going to college in about two weeks and I'll have to learn to drive. Most people would probably see that as a good thing, but naturally I don't. Why? Because I am growing up so quickly. Soon I'll be on my way to another country to further my studies and I'll be alone. How scary could that be? On another note, I still haven't thrown my old books away yet. Call it sentimental or anything but I just don't really feel like it because who knows, I might need them for future reference some day. Yeah, fat chance. My sister has a ton of old Cambridge A-Level books which I have yet to catalogue. They are currently lying in 3 neat little stacks awaiting their new master to make use of them. And they said college life was going to be a walk in the park... Heh...

Jin Han 11:59 PM

Monday, December 19, 2005

My trip to China was quite eventful - lots of places to go, people to see. I had the opportunity to witness how vile the citizens of China are. There are smokers everywhere whether it is in the hotel, on the streets, in the shops or any other sanitary place you could find. There is enough saliva on the streets of Shanghai to fill a dam. The sound of gurgling followed by a spit becomes a banal melody heard all over the lands of China. People push and shove all the time, not saying a simple "excuse me" or "sorry" as they try to squeeze between the large crowds that litter the streets. Common courtesy, it seems, only shows itself in shops where you are the consumer and they are the distributors. I am disgusted. I am disgusted by the way they act, the behaviours they exhibit, the rudeness they express so vividly... Apart from the fact that I did not want to go to China very much did not make things any easier. Everyone went to China because they wanted something from there, be it shopping for clothes, shoes or cheap pirated products, but not me. I did not want anything from China and every time my parents asked me something which I did not know in Mandarin, I would feel like I have let them down. As they kept asking I felt worse and worse because every question came with an expectation to know the answer. And when I could not answer them, I was met with the insecure desire to jump into a dumpster and hide for the rest of the trip. Nothing seemed right and I was in extremely foul moods most of the time, lost in my own world of distress and frustration. At this moment in time I am feeling a lot of rage within myself. I was asked by a good friend to attend a motivation course of sorts and I promised I could go with him. Unfortunately, my mother, as expected, showed her disapproval and was rather adamant on taking me there, which was Sunway Pyramid. She said that it was a waste of time. I respected her decision, but inside I knew that even if she was right, what was so different from staying at home and watching television? Would that not be a waste of time as well? What about sitting in front of the computer and playing trivial online games like Ragnarok Online or Gunbound? What about getting on the bed and sleeping the day away? What exactly did she consider a good use of time? I had to break my promise to my friend, which obviously made him very disappointed, thereby making me even more depressed than before. The phrase "waste of time" keeps ringing in my ears and I seem to getting more and more upset with myself as the day wears on. I feel really bad because I could not keep a promise, and I feel even worse because I have all this pent up rage for my family. I am the estranged one in the family, the only one who is different, the only one who is not in sync with the harmony that is a happy family. I fear the passing of years will only make this incompatibility all the more obvious...

Jin Han 6:41 PM

Saturday, December 10, 2005

During the flight to Singapore we got bored so we took some pictures. Here's one of the left turbines of the plane: pretty neat huh? We also took some pictures of the view from above. When you're above 20,000 feet all you see is clouds and nothing else. Sadly we did not notice any Carebears in the clouds, much to our dismay. everything seems so small..Like Simcity! where are the Carebears???!! Airline food that day pretty much sucked. The fishballs were tasteless, the fruits soaked in some sick looking substance and the kebabs were simple atrocious. No wonder my sister chose not to eat it. Damn. airline food.Yuck. Had dinner with my aunt and uncle at their house too. A little small but still cosy and perfect for a small family. Housing in Singapore can cost an arm and a leg as they said. Actually the whole purpose for that visit was to see the baby again! In just three or four days she grew a lot! Surprisingly the baby was very quiet. Most of the time she did not cry or wail, instead going back to sleep in about 3 seconds. 1-2-3 k.o. We got to ride in my uncle's car, an Audi A4 which I was dying to see. Then again in Singapore cars from Mercedes Benz, BMW, Mitsubishi and Porsche seem to be commonplace. Just the other day I saw a Mercedes Benz SL500!! Sadly I didn't have enough time to take a good picture of it. my uncle's Audi A4 The afternoons and evenings were filled with shopping and eating, some at cafes while others back at the hotel - room service. We stayed at the Hilton hotel on Orchard Road so it was really convenient to find shopping centres and cafes lying around the street. We had tea at the Border's Cafe while waiting for our room(which was in a really big mess) to be cleaned up. My sister had a root beer whilst I tried their chocolate muffin, which did not feel like one at all! It was more of a piece of bread than a wholesome muffin. that chocolate muffin, which tasted like bread the root beer, which was caffeine free

Jin Han 12:50 AM

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Hello all! Just returned from Singapore and guess what? The whole trip pretty much sucked. The beginning of the trip was pretty much normal in most respects. The typically long queues at the check-in counters, rude people who shove others to get ahead of the line and all that stuff. The flight was really short, about 30 minutes but my sister got spilled on by a rather careless air stewardess. She was pretty pissed about it and I could not blame her. can you imagine how much mango juice was in that cup?? So yeah, she got pretty pissed and I was quite frustrated with the stewardess because we were taking pictures all around the plane and she kept getting in the way. So we did the next best thing... in case you didn't know, that's that stupid air stewardess' butt Anyway the whole point of our trip was to attend our baby cousin's full moon and we got to see her up close. She is just about the cutest baby in the world!!! We couldn't take any pictures of her because it was too dark to do so but we got a free picture of her that came with a farewell gift in appreciation of our presence there. LoL. Isn't she the cutest thing you've ever seen? When she yawns her little tongue comes out and it makes her soooo CUTTEE!! Anyway, after the full moon we went shopping for clothes and whatnot. Unfortunately, everything went sour after that night as I woke up with a really bad stomachache and the nagging desire to go to the toilet. This went on for about four days, basically the whole duration of the trip. Most of the time I was clutching my stomach hoping to God that I would not have to go then and there. I think I must have shit my brains out at some point because I could not think properly after that. Let's see...3 times a day for 4 days. That's 12 times and I usually go to the toilet 12 times in a month!! Talk about natural detoxification. My sister also suffered the same fate except she got worse because of something called gastroentiritis as well as diarrhoea. It was horrible. When I got out of the toilet she went in. I did get most of what I wanted though, but really... That holiday was more of a nightmare than a respite from everything else. I am not going to Singapore for a very very VERY long time. I'll also be posting the rest of the pictures later in the week.

Jin Han 8:11 PM

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Well it has been a pretty long hiatus for me. One day more of SPM and I am free for the rest of the year and will start college on the 9th of January 2006. Lots of things to do but so little time to do them. Let's see... I am heading for Singapore this Sunday to celebrate the full moon of my cousin Chloe (on my mother's side) and will be spending another 4 days shopping. Hopefully I will be able to get a 60gb Ipod there if it is not sold out or anything. Oh God i do hope the black version don't get sold out. Apparently the Malaysian branch of Apple, Macasia, overprices their products so much it's just shocking. A 60gb Ipod costs about RM1500 (converted from Singapore dollars) but here it costs RM2099!!!! I know 21% tax is imposed but seriously, even then it wouldn't go as high as RM2099. I am also going to two proms this year, one organised by Sri Aman and the other by Catholic. As of yet I have not found an appropriate set of formal wear that would blow people away. Then again it wouldn't really matter because I am just going for fun. I never really understood the whole tradition of taking a girl to the prom. Most people have this impression that going alone to a prom or dance or party seems to imply that one is a loser or something like that. What's wrong with going alone? It's not like everyone is going to dance together or something right? Since I've never been to a prom before I guess I'll find out soon enough. However I do have my doubts about a prom being a memorable moment for people. I am expecting to feel that it will be a waste of time and not worth the money or the energy. Next up on my agenda is a 6 day vacation to China, more specifically Shanghai on the 12th. There will be loads of shopping and probably a plethora of pictures. Hopefully my memory card can sustain the amount of images I am going to take LoL. Coincidentally quite a few people I know are going to China as well whilst the rest of them are heading off to Genting Highlands for the class trip. When I come back I am going to watch King Kong! Seriously that movie has a lot of hype going for it, probably due to the fact that acclaimed director Peter Jackson is directing. Yeah you know who he is. He is none other than the mastermind behind the famed Lord of the Rings Trilogy. Hopefully he can pull it off again. I am really curious as to why there is a tyrannosaurus rex in the movie. Oh well, I can't wait for that either. Anyway, will post some pictures in a day or two because I have a LOT of packing to do. So many books to sell/throw. I'll post the transformation when I'm done.

Jin Han 6:17 PM

dislikes

Being apart from my sayang. Seeing animals get tortured. Seeing people get hurt. Losing what's important to me. Sluggish internet connections. Bittergourds and zombies.

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