| Tuesday, August 02, 2005 |
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something strange happened today...well at least early this morning at 1 sth in the morning...for some stupid reason i just logged into my hotmail account(which i no longer use) and lo and behold she pops up in my contact list...in the online column...i found it strange because i was blocked earlier and i shouldn't be seeing her online in my contact list...raised a lot of questions in my head and it stayed there throughout the day...really couldn't stop thinking about it..why...how...never once did i find an optimistic answer for my questions...i guess i'll never know till i ask...and that's what i plan to do if she comes online...now the hard part is figuring out what to say...o.o..a few months of no talking and you just find it difficult to express yourself despite the plethora of things you want to say...being inarticulant sure stinks big time...i find it difficult to even say hi to her...sigh...emotions within me are really building up....a bit of anxiety but most of it is focused on preparing myself for the worst...today quite a few of my friends were hurt because of love or like or crushes etc...most of them were not prepared for it...i kind of felt a bit sorry for them but it is a way of life i gather...i've been through it many times and have yet to learn a single thing say to always expect the worst from things because hoping will only bring a lot of disappointment if things go sour and things go sour a lot for me...i'm not looking for pity or sympathy..so if you're reading this please don't take pity on me...it gives me the impression that i've stooped to a whole new low and will be discriminated or frowned upon or something...never liked that feeling at all...then again who does? i guess school was a waste of time today...and so will tomorrow...this coming friday we are going to sunway lagoon...some lps members...about 100 something members(no idea how everyone's going to keep track of one another...)...anyway i don't know if i'll enjoy myself but if i do then yay!if not then oh well at least i got to skip school with bm and maths teachers out of my hair for one day...praise the Lord! anyway...i guess i've thought about her all day...it's not an obsession thing or anything but i just couldn't stop thinking about why she unblocked me and stuff...our last conversation painted a very vivid memory in my mind and i am sure i heard her right when she didn't want to chat with me again...argghh...these things are just too frustrating for words... *misses her quite a lot* |
| Jin Han 9:45 PM |
| profile |
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Jin loves brownies, cookies and cake. Jin has never been anywhere further than Australia. Jin could never stop being a sadistic, sarcastic meanie. Jin is also the opposite of everything said one line up when the need arises. Jin would rather have a desktop rather than a laptop. Jin has an obsessive, compulsive need to ramble, blabber and regurgitate all manner of nonsense. Jin hates being ignored by the people he loves. Jin hates being alone most of the time. Jin hates reflecting about his actions. It's taxing. Jin has a habit of thinking too much. Jin often doesn't see the glass as half-empty or half-full.He just sees the glass. To some, Jin is weird; to others, Jin is even weirder. Jin wants nothing more than to be happy. Rich would be a big plus though. Jin is pretty tired of referring himself in the third person's perspective. |
| dislikes |
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Being apart from my sayang. Seeing animals get tortured. Seeing people get hurt. Losing what's important to me. Sluggish internet connections. Bittergourds and zombies. |
| Links |
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Caleb Chongshen Darell Jac Kee Kathleen/Kelvin Krystle Li En Li Ying Mei Xin Nico Pin Pin Shu Ling Sze May Yan Chyi Zcui |
| Credits |
| This layout was originally created by undyinglove-haha, later modified by Yours Truly. Other credits go to X X and X Works best on   |