| Monday, May 23, 2005 |
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i was supposed to study today...but sadly i failed to do so...just didn't feel like studying anymore because it was a long break (4 days) and it was the last two days of exam...it got me worried...if i lost steam just 2 weeks after exam what about spm?that lasts about...one month!!so i guess i will have to really concentrate and focus on the exam the next time around,which is probably going to be around July...something about Gerak Gempur or something...if they use the whole syllabus on that one i think they are crazy because by then the teachers would not have finished...i don't even think that they will finish the syllabus by this year at the rate they are going unless they have a LOT of extra classes...anyway,i did manage to cram in a chapter or 2 of history...and i'm reading my biology right now...but 30 minutes ago i was watching a documentary on kissing...seriously...they talked about the muscles used to kiss,hormones stimulated by the kiss,how it boosts the immune system etc...i just sat there in front of the television staring in disbelief..i was watching people kissing for 30 minutes straight...it was really funny though... anyway,things were going oh so well when again...she popped up in my mind...a boat load of memories resurfaced and suddenly i saw flashbacks of almost everything that happened between us...it was really scary because every time it played,it really hit hard...i still find it difficult to cope with the fact that she and i are not talking anymore...last time i only talked to a few people online...now i'm talking to less...it's not her fault really...i hate it when people who know about my predicament think that she is to blame or something...i really would like to bash their heads in if they did think that because it never was her fault...it was my very actions that led to my own undoing...i hate it that i've caused her pain in the past...but that is one of many things i cannot prevent...if i had the power to change things i would ameliorate her life,whether personal or otherwise...basically the easiest way to get over her is to fall for someone else,but when you have started thinking that she is near perfect,you find it hard for anyone else to fill their shoes...maybe i'm making a big deal out of a small thing...maybe i'm just exaggerating about my feelings for her...or maybe not...i really cannot tell...but every time her visage appears in the front of my mind i cannot help depressed...dwelling on the past is indeed a dangerous and relatively useless thing to do...but i just can't help it...sigh...maybe those are one of the reasons why i am seeking Christianity...because i am looking for something to hold onto...to seek God's wisdom and put my faith and feelings into God and Lord Jesus Christ... |
| Jin Han 11:06 PM |
| profile |
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Jin loves brownies, cookies and cake. Jin has never been anywhere further than Australia. Jin could never stop being a sadistic, sarcastic meanie. Jin is also the opposite of everything said one line up when the need arises. Jin would rather have a desktop rather than a laptop. Jin has an obsessive, compulsive need to ramble, blabber and regurgitate all manner of nonsense. Jin hates being ignored by the people he loves. Jin hates being alone most of the time. Jin hates reflecting about his actions. It's taxing. Jin has a habit of thinking too much. Jin often doesn't see the glass as half-empty or half-full.He just sees the glass. To some, Jin is weird; to others, Jin is even weirder. Jin wants nothing more than to be happy. Rich would be a big plus though. Jin is pretty tired of referring himself in the third person's perspective. |
| dislikes |
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Being apart from my sayang. Seeing animals get tortured. Seeing people get hurt. Losing what's important to me. Sluggish internet connections. Bittergourds and zombies. |
| Links |
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Caleb Chongshen Darell Jac Kee Kathleen/Kelvin Krystle Li En Li Ying Mei Xin Nico Pin Pin Shu Ling Sze May Yan Chyi Zcui |
| Credits |
| This layout was originally created by undyinglove-haha, later modified by Yours Truly. Other credits go to X X and X Works best on   |