| Tuesday, May 31, 2005 |
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today was quite tiring...quite a few tuitions..thank God tomorrow i only have one...and another session of gym of course... ....i really feel like i can't take it anymore...everything seems out of place...it's just ironic how some things just backfire on you just like that...how one thing can quickly lead to another and blam...you've hit rock bottom...i'm doing a poem on faces in literature...it's a poem on how the poet wants to stop hiding behind the many faces he displays so that people would not feel less secure around him..or so that he could entertain people..something like that...he wants to stop being insincere with everyone including himself...he really wants to...but he can't...i'm beginning to understand why even in real life,we cannot show our true feelings or so called "faces"...if everyone was being honest with each other,sure the world would be a better place,then again it won't...less people would be able to get along with other...tolerance as we know it would decrease to an alarming point and the world would be torn apart by its own dominant inhabitants...why?because we are honest...sometimes honesty is not the best policy...i happen to know that being honest can often lead to some disastrous consequences...of course it is not without its risks...as usual..that is the circle of life...the worst part however is being dishonest with yourself...if you know in your heart that you've been lying to yourself then i guess you really should get a reality check...ignorance may be bliss but it can be quite unhealthy...delusions might follow...oh gosh i hope i don't turn delusional...i'm listening to sad songs almost all the time...some melancholy and some depressing...i think i really have to snap out of it but once again...i'm lying to myself...i keep telling myself that i am fine but of course i'm not...suddenly nothing in my life seems great...i try to cling to faith but instead i seem to fall short...i guess that means i haven't reached the degree of faith required to assent that i'm a Christian...sigh...i really don't know if these things take time or not...i really have to talk to Esther...where is that girl when i need her...then again where is everyone when i need them? |
| Jin Han 11:09 PM |
| profile |
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Jin loves brownies, cookies and cake. Jin has never been anywhere further than Australia. Jin could never stop being a sadistic, sarcastic meanie. Jin is also the opposite of everything said one line up when the need arises. Jin would rather have a desktop rather than a laptop. Jin has an obsessive, compulsive need to ramble, blabber and regurgitate all manner of nonsense. Jin hates being ignored by the people he loves. Jin hates being alone most of the time. Jin hates reflecting about his actions. It's taxing. Jin has a habit of thinking too much. Jin often doesn't see the glass as half-empty or half-full.He just sees the glass. To some, Jin is weird; to others, Jin is even weirder. Jin wants nothing more than to be happy. Rich would be a big plus though. Jin is pretty tired of referring himself in the third person's perspective. |
| dislikes |
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Being apart from my sayang. Seeing animals get tortured. Seeing people get hurt. Losing what's important to me. Sluggish internet connections. Bittergourds and zombies. |
| Links |
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Caleb Chongshen Darell Jac Kee Kathleen/Kelvin Krystle Li En Li Ying Mei Xin Nico Pin Pin Shu Ling Sze May Yan Chyi Zcui |
| Credits |
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